Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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