if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
