i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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