she looked like the bat from fern gully.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Randomize
