I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize