i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
