I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
