And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
