I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize