i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
