Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
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