Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize