haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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