I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Nicole vs. Life
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
