You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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