so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I have aggressive nipples.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
