yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
