Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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