More tranny stories later!
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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