The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
