After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
