What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
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