whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
