Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
