OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
