am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
