So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
