So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize