Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Randomize
