i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
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