I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
