So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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