Are we in a gay sports bar?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
