PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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