i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize