Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
