She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Randomize
