Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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