yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize