I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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