K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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