Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
