I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize