I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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