Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
