i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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