Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
