My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
