but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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