U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
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