Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
