ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
